One Week

One week till my flight leaves.

Am I ready to go? God no. How can you really ever be completely ready for something like this? I got an email from the University of Adelaide yesterday confirming my username and password for my University account. My “username” is just a bunch of numbers.. why isn’t it my name? Anyhow, that confirmation means that I’m able to finally apply for my Student Visa and schedule my classes. I’m stoked for the courses I plan on signing up for! There are 4 classes I want to take: An English/Lit course called ‘Passions’, a poetry class, a philosophy course on aesthetics, and an anthropology course on Australian culture and society. All 4 sound really interesting! They don’t offer classes like that at IUPUI!

My last couple weeks in the US have gone well. Still working at Starbucks.. my last day is next Wednesday. Last week finished up the summer class I was taking at IUPUI. I officially moved out of my apartment downtown on campus yesterday and now am living at home in Fishers with my parents, my sisters, my brother, and Dusty and Stubby for the next week. Though it’s a decent sized house I’m a little worried about the 6 of us living under the same roof..  though we all love each other dearly, I feel we all have the same stubbornness and independence, which can cause the occasional violent argument. Despite the tight quarters, it’ll be nice to spend my last week here with my whole family. They are the best friends I have.

Last weekend was my last weekend in Indy… pretty big deal. I had a “going away party” thing Friday night for all my friends downtown. Its interesting how the fact that I’m going away has affected my friendships. Some friends I’ve gotten much closer to the past few weeks while others have simply let go of me. Its kind of eye opening to really see those who value me and those who don’t as much. Why does the fact that I’m going away for a semester have such an affect on my closest friends?  Anyhow, Friday night a handful of my friends met up w/ me and we went out to some of the bars downtown, beginning the night at Howl at the Moon, a piano bar. My friend, Jasmine, went behind my back and requested the piano guy sing Land Down Under for me, a catchy eighties song about Australia :P I was sitting there in the corner sipping my Dirty Shirley when to my surprise the singer finished his song then said over the speaker, “So, I hear someone’s going to Australia soon! Nicky, will you come up here?” Haha! I was embarrassed but thrilled. My face was bright red the whole time he sang “Land Down Under” to me, but I loved it. :) thanks Jaz. We went to a couple other of our regular bars downtown and I had a blast with my crew :) I will certainly miss my city. Saturday I went to a camp out/concert/cook out thing with my friends Justin, Ashley, and Sarah. It was the perfect summertime in Indiana experience and I loved every moment :) Returned to Fishers Sunday and commuted to work in Indy for the rest of the week.

This weekend Mom, Dad, Al, KC, TJ, and I are all headed up to Wisconsin for the annual Steussy family reunion. The Steussy side of the family owns a beautiful farmhouse and 100 acres of farmland in the countryside by New Glarus, WI and yearly, usually over the holiday weekend, they host a reunion so we can all get together with family and reconnect. Its always a really good time.. a weekend filled with good company, great food, and amazing wine. We’ll be there through Monday, then Tuesday will have my family going away/birthday party since my 22^nd birthday is July 17^th and I’ll be gone then.  Then I’ll have Wednesday and Thursday to get everything together and say my last goodbyes, and Friday (a week from today) my flight leaves and I’ll be Australia-bound.

Although my anxiousness is growing now with only 7 days left, I’m doing a lot better than I thought I’d be. Sure, its scary to think I’ll be in a strange place so far away from home with no money and no idea where anything is or how to get there.. but in all honesty, I feel good about it. There’s something about going to a brand new place where there are no expectations of you that gives a person the ultimate feeling of freedom. No one will know me or care about me there… I will be on my own. Completely. I have a blank slate over there in Adelaide, and it will be a new start for me. Who will Nicky be in Australia? I have no idea. I’ll create her. I’m ready to leave this girl behind. I’m ready to be something new… to embrace something completely different than the life I live and the person I am. This is my chance to learn about myself and grow. Its something I need, and always knew I needed… I just never had the courage to just put myself out there like this. To be honest, I’m hungry for the discomfort… the fear… the getting lost and the talking to strangers… I’m hungry for not being known. Doing this will set me free. Free from every memory, every reminder, every expectation… I will be nobody there, and that’s what I want most of all. Its like a vacation from being me…. Does that make sense? For a while there, everything will be brand new for me, and I believe it will be a refreshing escape. I will not dwell on what I’m leaving behind.. but focus on the excitement ahead of me.

Anyhow, a fun weekend ahead and a stressful week after that as I get everything together and organized for my flight out on Friday.